This is how I feel now:
I am happy right now that I'm in my apartment, it gives me cover and warmth, I feel safe.
A few things slightly puncture that:
Tomorrow I need to go to a different base until Wednesday, I don't really like going to other bases, although this time it may be fun.
Gilad is not home and may not be for another 11 days (he's been gone for a week already). It's hard because
I need to hear the whistle of his voice in my atmosphere
The vitality of his being in my realm
To know that I'm safe
In the merging of my fearful self
Into an evergreen serenity.
It's actually crazy, insane, that it'll be three whole years of seeing Gilad never more than one week at a time. What a crazy existence we have here in this country.
My love, my fiber
Illucid and invisible most of the time.